Return
by Rayven Lilith Sky
Summary: Nikola had certainly never expected to find himself a teacher, much less a teacher at the school of magic he had graduated from almost 150 years previous. And he certainly did not expect his best friend to tag along and try to make his life a living hell.
1. Chapter 1

AN: This is just something I can up with randomly one day and finally decided to try writing it out and see what the result was. I think it turned out fairly well and I probably will continue it if I am not distracted by all the other fics I have in progress.

* * *

The change in the normally dull magical castle was incredibly drastic and very unusual. The floors and walls seemed to glimmer with unusual cleanliness. The windows were sparkling and looked almost brand new. The staff noticed other things that seemed to happen. The tapestries and paintings had not a speck of dust on them and hung with an almost militaristic straightness. The suits of armor lining the hallways seemed to stand a little taller and the statues somehow managed to look a little prouder. The entire area was buzzing with an almost excited energy that was making all of the teaching staff light headed. The whole castle had been like this for two weeks, ever since the arrival of the two new teachers. It was as though something had awoken within the castle and was incredibly happy. Both of the new teachers were currently walking the halls so they could make their way to the arrival and sorting of new students.

One of the men was swaying slightly as he walked down the hall in an almost dreamlike state, hands clasped in front of him, humming slightly. It seemed almost as though he were listening to music or some other sounds unheard by any other. The other man was following his friend looking slightly worried and ignoring the almost happy magical humming in the back of his mind. He was doing his best to ignore the tingling of magic over his skin as he looked at his friend in concern.

"You do realize you are really worrying me with your spacing out." Nikola said as his friend Luc was staring dreamily out into the distance with a soft smile on his face as they walked.

"Hmm?" Luc snapped out of his daze and looked at Nikola who was giving him weird looks. "Oh sorry. Just haven't been around this much magic in a while. It seems to be making me a bit giddy and lightheaded. Plus I think the castle missed me."

"You are so weird."

"But you love me anyway."

"Since when?"

"Bitch."

"Jerk." Nikola grinned at Luc who smiled back at him as they walked to the Great Hall.

"Oh Nicky you wound me." Luc said in a mocking tone. "Why not just give me a paper cut and pour lemon juice on it while you're at it?"

"Don't forget the salt." Nikola quipped.

"You do know that I am not a tequila shot?" Luc said in amusement.

"Vampire. And it wouldn't be the first time I've done that."

"Ew. That was just weird and gross. I don't care that you're a vampire, that is just creepy."

"Actually it's not so bad if you mix the blood with the tequila."

"Again…Ew. How do you…never mind. I do not want to know when you learned that. You are so never drinking tequila around me…ever."

"You started it." Nikola said in amusement before looking around in confusion. "I think we're lost. I don't think I have seen this part of the castle before. Or maybe it's just been a while."

"Like a hundred fifty years?"

"Yes actually. What about you?"

"Um...don't remember actually."

"That long huh? Guess we really are lost then."

"Don't be silly. All we have to do is go down one more flight of stairs, take the right corridor, make the second left, first right, go through the hidden door by the fourth window then go to the third left, tickle the statue of the griffin under the beak and then straight ahead about thirty feet, a quick right and we'll be right there. Honestly, it isn't that difficult." Luc said in a matter of fact tone as Nikola looked at him in disbelief at his quick instructions.

"Are you sure you haven't been here for a while?" Nikola asked suspiciously.

"Some things you just don't forget." Luc said cheerfully as he started down the steps with his friend close behind.

"Like the password to the box containing your wand in your vault in Gringotts to which you forgot your key?"

"Shut up. And I couldn't help it…it's been way to long since I've used magic."

"The password I could understand, but the key?"

"I have too many keys because I have too much stuff ok? Don't judge me."

"But you make it so easy." Nikola said in an innocent tone.

"Don't think for one second I won't steal your wand and hide it from you then leave you to wander aimlessly until you find your way."

"You wouldn't do that. You like my company too much."

"Sure about that are you?" Luc said with a mischievous grin and ducked down a corridor with Nikola following slowly. Nikola checked his pockets and growled in annoyance and rushed after his friend.

"I am going to kill you Lucifer Raziel Blackwood! Give me back my wand now!" Nikola yelled as he chased Luc down the halls.

"You have to catch me first vampire." Luc said over his shoulder as he ran. "Let's see you try to catch up with me."

By the time they reached the Great Hall Nikola had managed to catch up fairly well. He tackled his Naga friend just as they passed through the doors and started rifling through his pockets. Luc pushed Nikola off him and started to get up but Nikola grabbed his ankle causing him to fall flat on his face as Nikola again tried to get his wand. While they wrestled on the ground, the other professors were just looking at them in surprise and shock at the sight of the two new professors acting like a pair of delinquent children. Finally Nikola managed to get the wand and get away from his friend. He straightened his clothes and tucked his wand away before reluctantly offering Luc a hand up. Luc accepted and pulled himself upright and proceeded to fix his clothes as well before they both headed over to the table as though nothing had happened.

"So…" Luc sat down with his wand tucked behind his ear as he clasped his hands behind head and dropped his feet on the table. "What's for dinner?"

Nikola just put his face in his palm and slouched down in his chair while muttering to himself. "Why me?"

Luc sat up swiftly and peeked into his pocket all of a sudden before sighing with relief. Nikola looked at him oddly.

"What was that for?"

"Chi Chi is still in one piece in my pocket. Gotta love those bigger on the inside pockets. Do you want to come out sweetie?" He asked as he looked into his pocket. Nikola just shook his head as a black mamba slid out of his pocket and up his arm to wrap loosely around his neck a couple of times. Everyone gasped at the dangerous creature that the man was cooing over as though it was a fluffy kitten.

"You named your magical black mamba Chi Chi?" Nikola asked slowly at the man who was somehow managing to cuddle with the serpent.

"Yup. Isn't she just the cutest?" Luc gushed as he shoved the snake in Nikola's face. Nikola tried to back up slightly as the snake hissed in his face. Thankfully Luc pulled the snake away and cuddled with it again. The snake itself seemed quite happy to curl up around the man and seemed to hiss in contentment.

"Cute isn't exactly the word I would use. And really of all names in the world you used Chi Chi? That is the kind of name you give an annoying little Chihuahua or some other irritating little pocketbook dog."

"Don't say that. You'll hurt her feelings." Luc said with a frown.

"God I need a drink." Nikola muttered as everyone else still watched them in silence, not knowing how to react to the odd pair.

"By the way Nikola…I think you grabbed my wand instead of yours." Luc said absently before putting the snake away in his pocket again. Nikola pulled out the wand and indeed it was Luc's. It was slim and a pure bony white color, about 11 inches long with dark greenish black scales on the handle. Nikola slid it over to Luc and Professor McGonagall couldn't help but ask about the unusual wand.

"If I might ask, what is your wand made of?"

"Basilisk Fang base with Nundu blood core and Basilisk scales on the handle." Luc said as he slid Nikola's wand to him. Nikola's was an unusual one as well being 10 inches long, slim and a pale yellowish white color with a glossy woven black hair on the handle.

"And what about yours Nikola? I never did ask about that." Luc said.

"Electrum, primarily Gold and Silver with traces of Platinum and Copper as a base with a Lightning Bird feather core and woven Thestral Hair on the handle."

Luc was silent for a moment before looking at his friend.

"That is so totally you."

"Yours as well."

"Very powerful wands." Dumbledore said genially.

"Powerful maybe, useful…not so much for me." Luc said with a pout. "My wand has a mind of its own. It only seems to work when it wants to work. Unless I speak in Parseltounge, then it works perfectly." Luc muttered the last sentence low enough that only Nikola could hear.

"You know you never did explain why you bought a snake when you have a perfectly good pet in your vault." Nikola said in amusement.

"I didn't think it would be a good idea to bring a Hellhound to the school. Besides…that crossroads demon, I can never remember his name, and I played cards a while back and he would probably try to convince me to give the hound back. That reminds me, I owe him a bottle of scotch." Luc said absently causing everyone to stare at him again.

"Luc…"

"Hmm?"

"I think you should shut up now before you break them even more." Nikola said with a small laugh at the shocked faces. "Don't worry, you get used to hearing about the odd things he's done."

"I doubt it." One of the staff said thankful that the students were arriving so the conversation could wait until later.

The students entered the Great Hall for another year at Hogwarts. The elder students sat at their respective house tables to chat amongst themselves before the House Sorting. Among these happened to be a particular trio of Gryffindor fifth year students. Harry Potter, Hermione Granger and Ronald Weasely were currently discussing who their new defense teacher would be this year.

"Which one do you think it is?" Hermione asked.

"Dunno. Why are there two of them anyway?" Ron whispered to his friends.

"I don't know but Snape does not look happy to see them." Harry said.

"Does he ever?" Ron said and they laughed quietly as they glanced at the Head table to see all their usual professors and two they didn't recognize.

One was a tall, slim man with short spiky brunette hair that looked a lot like he had been electrocuted, steely blue grey eyes and slightly pale skin. He looked not unlike a large cat with the way he currently slouched gracefully (though how anyone could slouch and make it look graceful is a mystery, but then again they obviously do not know that the man in question could make brooding, slouching, lurking and sprawling into an art form) in a well-tailored navy blue three-piece suit while playing with a goblet.

The other was also tall with wavy blond hair, a set of the most soul piercing emerald green eyes you have ever seen, skin slightly tanned and he was slightly more muscular then the other man. He had a mysterious smile on his face as though he knew something important and wasn't going to share. He was dressed in a similar suit as well, though his was black as opposed to blue. He wasn't slouching but somehow managed to portray an air of boredom about him as well as an odd trace of amusement.

They saw the blond swat the brunette's hand away from the goblet and place it away from him. The other man glared and rolled his eyes at whatever the blond said before the first year students being led into the hall for their sorting diverted his attention away for the moment. Once the sorting was finished and the feast concluded Dumbledore stood up for his evening announcements.

"Welcome back to another year at Hogwarts. I know you are all tired from your long journey today so I shall keep my announcements short this evening. First of all I would like you all to welcome your new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher Mr. Nikola Tesla." Everyone clapped politely and the blond nudged the brunette (obviously Tesla) to get his attention so he could stand for a moment so everyone would know whom he was. Nikola sat down quickly and went back to fiddling with his cutlery before a smack on his hands stopped him.

"And I am sorry to say that our own Professor Binns has decided to move on, so his replacement for the year is Mr. Lucifer Blackwood." Everyone went wild at the news that Binns was finally gone and it took several minutes for the ruckus to die down. Luc just waved hello to everyone once it went quiet again and Dumbledore continued.

"He will also be assisting Madame Pomfrey in the infirmary. He is a fully qualified Healer and has offered to fill in for Madame Pomfrey as she will be unavailable at times this year because both of her sisters are expected to give birth within the next few months."

"Now as usual the Forbidden Forest is as always forbidden. And Mr. Filch would like me to remind you that his list of banned objects is now at five hundred and eighty two, a list of which can be found in Mr. Filch's office should anyone wish to take a look. Now those are all the announcements I have to make so I bid you all goodnight and pleasant dreams." And with that everyone left the hall to go to his or her dormitories.

The Gryffindor trio went to their common room and claimed their favorite chairs by the fire.

"So…how long until the new defense teacher tries to kill Harry?" Ron asked, trying to hide a grin.

"Two months." Fred said as he joined the conversation.

"The real question though is what is this one?" George said as he sat down next to his twin.

"Death Eater?"

"Werewolf?"

"Polyjuiced Maniac?" The twins stopped the little back and forth banter and grinned turning to the rest of the room.

"Ok everyone." Fred said as he turned to the rest of the Gryffindor's.

"Who wants to place a bet on what the new defense teacher happens to be and when he will try to kill Harry?" George said and the room erupted into movement with almost everyone placing bets.

Harry just shook his head and his friends tried not to giggle at him.

"I'm so glad they're making money at my expense." He said dryly.

"Well you have to admit that you do have bad luck when it comes to defense teachers." Hermione said cautiously.

"She's right you know. Everyone of our teachers for the past few years have tried to kill you." Ron said.

"Moony didn't." Harry said quickly.

"Technically he went wolf on us. So I think that counts even if he didn't mean to." Ron said. Harry just rolled his eyes and stared at the fire for a moment.

"Ok fine. I am the most unlucky person ever."

"At least you're finally admitting it." Ron said with a straight face. Harry just swatted him with a cushion as they all laughed.

"Relax Harry. I'm sure everything will be fine. So, did you finish your homework this summer?" Hermione said and they dropped the matter of evil teachers for the moment.


	2. Chapter 2

The Gryffindor Trio arrived at breakfast early and got their schedules from McGonagall. Harry groaned as he looked at the classes he had today.

"History, double Potions, Divination and double Defense Against The Dark Arts all in one day." Harry said and put his head on the table with a sigh.

"Well at least we get a chance to see how good the new teachers are." Hermione said as she started piling breakfast on her plate and Harry's.

"And see whether or not they want to kill me." Harry muttered as he pulled his head up and started eating. Ron hadn't joined the conversation, as he was too busy shoveling food into his mouth.

"Stop being paranoid Harry. They probably wont try to kill you on the first day of class, they'll wait at least a month." Hermione said matter of factly.

"Hey, they just walked in." Ron said through a mouthful of food spraying it all over the table, causing Harry and Hermione to look at him in disgust for a moment before turning to the new Professors who had walked in.

"So what are you planning for today Luc?" Nikola asked as they walked slowly to the head table.

"Lets just say it will be an interesting lesson. What about you? What have you got planned?"

"Plenty, creatures, spells, wordless casting, my day is full." Nikola said.

"I'm sure you will be just fine." Luc said patting Nikola on the head before he got smacked upside the head himself.

"Hey, don't set a bad example for the young impressionable minds in our midst." Luc scolded playfully as they sat down for breakfast out of earshot of the students.

"It sounds like it will be an interesting day." Hermione said before turning back to her scrambled eggs.

* * *

The Slytherin and Gryffindor students trickled into the History classroom slowly and took their seats. Harry, Ron and Hermione ran inside just before the bell and took their seats. They were waiting for a few minutes before their Professor rushed in while straightening his bowtie and smoothing out his suit. He sat down on the edge of his desk and took a breath before grabbing his roster and started calling out names and checking them off. He dropped the parchment on the table when he finished and clapped his hands together.

"Hello students of Slytherin and Gryffindor. I would like to ask you all not to start anything in my classroom as it would upset me very much and my detentions get very creative. Anywho, I'm Professor Lucifer Blackwood. You can call me Professor Blackwood, or Luc if you prefer something more impersonal in the classroom. Now, let's jump right in and get started with today's lesson." He stood up and started walking down the aisle of desks.

"Who here can tell me about the Unforgivable curses?" He asked brightly. Several students raised their hands slowly.

"You there." He said pointing at one of the Slytherins. "One of the Big Three. Come on quickly now."

"The Cruciatus Curse which causes pain to the person whom is it cast upon." Draco said proudly.

"Well done, take five points for your house. Next one?" He said pointing at Hermione.

"The Imperious Curse, which takes over the mind of the person and allows you to control them completely. It is possible to throw off the curse though." Luc held up a hand to forestall any further explanation.

"Good, good, five points for you as well. And the last one?"

"The Killing Curse, which is kind of self explanatory." Harry said without having been called on.

"Yes, thank you Mr…what was it again?" Luc asked absently.

"Potter." Harry said waiting for the usual reaction to his name. He was pleasantly surprised when Luc didn't react and simply kept talking.

"Potter, thank you. It always takes me a while to get names right. Five points for you. Now to everyone who gave me answers, you are both right and completely wrong. I was asking if anyone here knows how they first came into existence and why."

No one raised their hand but only looked at each other in confusion before one Slytherin raised their hand.

"Yes?"

"Blaise Zambini. Salazar Slytherin created them." The boy said simply.

"Correct Mr. Zambini. Take five points. Now I am sure that everyone here is probably thinking that he created them for the purpose of destroying those not of pureblood but nothing could be further from the truth. Originally the spells were created for healing."

Everyone balked at that and started speaking all at once. Luc whistled loudly and everyone stopped talking and settled down.

"Thank you. Now as I was saying, they were created for healing by Salazar because he himself was a Healer. We will get more into that at our next lesson, in the meantime, the Cruciatus curse was originally used to test limbs after they had been reattached to see if they were still working. A Healer would focus the spell on the area that had been reattached to see what kind of reaction came forth. If a person felt pain in the area and was able to move then the limb had been attached correctly and if the limb felt no pain or didn't move then the limb was not on correctly or a spell or potion was interfering with the healing. The spells use as a method of torture was not used until almost six hundred years later when the Dark Lady Lasiandra decided to twist its original purpose to suit her means."

"The Imperious Curse was used to help people with bad habits not unlike how Mundanes use hypnotism to do the same. It was also used to help people with severe depression and suicidal tendencies. Originally it was used only by Healers who take an oath to do no harm to their patients and as such would not use the spell to their own advantage. It became labeled as a dark spell a mere two hundred years ago when a wizard learned of the spell and caused his wife to kill herself so he could marry his mistress. It soon came into practice amongst the general population who soon used it for their own means and twisted its true purpose."

"What about the Killing Curse, how could that ever be a Healing spell?" Someone asked causing Luc smiled softly and somewhat sadly.

"A thousand years ago the plague swept across the land. It was a slow, and painful death even to magic users. There was little people could do except try to ease the pain of the person affected. Imagine a person you love with a deadly fever, delirious, in agonizing pain from sores on their body and painful lung infection, which would often fill their lungs with fluid effectively drowning them on dry land. If you had the power to end their pain and suffering with two simple words…wouldn't you allow them the peace they deserve?" Luc paused for a moment and the class remained silent as he continued.

"Two words and they would feel nothing, it would simply be over, no suffering like other death curses. Salazar created this spell because his own wife fell ill, she asked him to kill her because she could not bear the pain nor bear to see her husband in such pain at not being able to help. So he created a spell, which would allow her to die with no further pain. It would simply end. Now I ask, what would you do in such a situation? Would you allow your loved one to suffer through an agonizing death? Or would you with two simple words give them a painless ending?" Luc stopped talking and perched, cross-legged on his desk as everyone absorbed his words.

"And here ends the lesson for today children. I trust you will think on this and remember that not everything is what it seems. Next lesson we shall start on the Founders Four. Until then children, I bid you good day."

The bell rang to signal the class was over. Everyone started packing up their things and left in deep thought.

* * *

By the time DADA rolled around the Slytherin and Gryffindor fifth years were incredibly curious as to what this teacher was going to be like. They walked into the classroom to find the desks stacked against the walls and in the center of the room their History professor and DADA professor were currently in the middle of a sword fight. They watched in amazement at the deadly dance of steel until finally Nikola's sword went flying out of his hand and he felt cold steel against his throat.

"I told you so." Luc said playfully before sheathing the sword.

"Alright, I wont doubt you on this again. You will have to show me that move sometime." Nikola said as he retrieved his sword, sheathed it and with a flick of his wand sent the desks back to their usual places. "Well come in and have a seat." He said to the students who grabbed their seats quickly.

"Sure. I should get going, let you teach in peace." Luc took Nikola's sword as Nikola put on his suit jacket and turned to his class. Luc slipped out the door with a wave at the students before the door shut.

"My apologies for that display. I think we lost track of time. Anyway, I am your teacher Professor Nikola Tesla. You may address me as Professor Tesla or Nikola if you must. I did attend Hogwarts a while ago, was in Hufflepuff, graduated top of my class before attending both magical and mundane Oxford to further my education. Now that I have introduced myself, let me take roll and then we can start our lesson." Nikola took roll quickly before turning back to his students who looked slightly taken aback at his brusque manner.

"Now then, your Defense education has been severely lacking. Your first teacher was incompetent, your second a complete and utter fool who wouldn't know which end of a wand to hold, your third was decent enough but spent too much time on creatures, your fourth was a disguised Death Eater and apparently a decent enough teacher with spell work. Perhaps you're third and fourth should have worked together." Nikola muttered the last sentence before continuing. "I have a lot of work to do if you are going to get even halfway decent OWL results and it is my intention for you all to do no less then Excellent on said OWL's. That having been said, I suppose I should start with the actual lesson."

"Now then, today's topic of discussion is one of particular interest to me and one that I know you have yet to study…Vampires." He paused as whispers started to break out amongst the students before quickly quieting down.

"Who would like to give me a brief description of vampires?" He looked around the room before gesturing for Hermione to speak.

"Vampires are dark creatures that drink blood, cannot go out in sunlight without turning to ash, they can't touch crosses, holy water burns them, they hate garlic, some are capable of shape shifting into bats …"

"That is quite enough Ms. Granger. An excellent summary of the vampire." Hermione beamed with pride until the professor's next words wiped the smile from her face. "Unfortunately the only correct fact in that whole thing was the fact they drink blood."

"Sanguine Vampiris, known by the Ancient Sumerians as Akhkharu and more commonly to those of us today without a scientific mind as Vampires. They are not, contrary to myths, affected by sunlight, crucifixes or garlic. They do not have the ability to transform into bats either. Most of the myths about vampires that you are aware of come from the vampires themselves, who perpetuated the information to allow an advantage." Nikola strode slowly through the rows of desks as his silky voice entranced his students.

"Vampires were once the most powerful race of being on this planet, more advanced then you can imagine. They used that advanced knowledge and technology to enslave mankind and become their rulers. They became the kings and pharaohs who ruled over such great civilizations as the Egyptians, Greeks and Romans. Under the rule of vampires the world entered a Golden Age unlike any other. Science, Technology, Art and Architecture made great strides under their influence." Nikola's velvety voice was practically a whisper yet it was so silent in the classroom that everyone could hear as though he were speaking in a regular tone.

"Humanity eventually rose against their vampire masters, primarily with the Catholic Church encouraging such action, and overthrew them. It was through magic that humanity was able to render vampires sterile, preventing them perpetuating the species. They were hunted down until the few that remained retreated to a city deep in the Himalayas known as Bhalasaam, the last refuge for the vampires that were left. With vampires removed from power, humans entered a period known as the Dark Ages so called because technology and culture regressed to a far more primitive state." He paused for a moment to catch his breath before continuing.

"It wasn't until the turn of the 20th century that Bhalasaam was attacked by an alliance of French, Spanish and Russian forces. Four days, that is what it took to destroy the great city and leave it in ruin from the non-stop bombardments of those four days. And with that the vampire species came to be extinct. At least as far as we know."

"Now then, the abilities of a vampire include highly enhanced strength, speed, reflexes and their senses far surpass that of a human. They were immortal and highly resistant to injury because they possessed a healing factor that could heal injuries that would be fatal to humans in a fraction of the time. They were immune to all diseases because of their healing factor. They could also understand a person's identity and language by simply tasting their blood. One of the few things that we do know about Vampires is that they were capable of reproducing with humans. That means there is a good chance that any one of you could have had a vampire ancestor and thus have vampire traits laying dormant in your blood." He smiled at the looks on everyone's faces at the thought of having a vampire ancestor before he finished up his lecture.

"It would be impossible to distinguish a vampire from a human until they bring out their vampire traits. When their vampire characteristics are out their eyes turn a solid black, their teeth become razor sharp and they have retractable claws at the tip of each finger."

Nikola was by now leaning against his desk as the lesson came to an end.

"And that concludes my lecture on the Sanguine Vampiris. Your homework will be to research and write an in depth paper on vampires due at the end of the month. At least one foot of parchment is required and there is no limit to the length." The bell rang signaling the end of classes and everyone left chattering excitedly about the lecture and assignment.

* * *

Once the students had left the room Nikola slumped into the chair behind his desk.

"Long day?" Luc popped his head into the room before striding in until he was a few feet away from Nikola.

"Just have to get used to teaching. It is a bit different then what I am used to and why the hell are you wearing a bowtie?" Nikola asked.

"Bowties are cool." Luc said adjusting said bowtie.

"No more Doctor Who for you." Nikola mumbled and shook his head.

"Must you be so cruel?"

"Yes."

"Come on and admit it, you just don't like the bowtie because you can't pull it off the way I can."

"Yes, that must be the reason." Nikola said sarcastically.

"I can always watch Torchwood instead…"

"No. You do not need to get ideas from that show as well."

"You are just a wet blanket on my fire of fun." Luc said with a pout.

"So you keep saying my friend." Nikola said as they headed downstairs for dinner. "How was your day anyway Luc?" Nikola asked his friend who immediately started telling him about his day.


	3. Chapter 3

AN: Yay another chapter that I actually remembered to finish. Don't have much to say for this note except I use the term Nagini but I am not referring to Voldy's snake. Naga is the term used for the species and male Naga. Female Naga on the other hand are referred to as Nagi or Nagini. I use the term Nagini in this chapter so I just wanted to clarify that for everyone so it won't cause confusion.

* * *

"Yeah and a Thestral is just a gothic My Little Pony." Nikola said sarcastically on the way to breakfast with Luc.

"There is no need for sarcasm. Seriously, whatever is eating you must be suffering horribly today." Luc said pleasantly as he skipped down to the Great Hall.

"You do know that fucking overly cheerful people like you are the reason people like me take pills?" Nikola said grumpily. He was always like this in mornings until he had at least two cups of industrial strength coffee in his system.

"You take pills anyway but now I see the problem, there's too much blood in your caffeine system today." Luc nodded knowingly at his grumpy friend.

"Fuck you. The whole human race is lucky I'm a nice guy, otherwise only 1/4 of them would be alive right now." Nikola muttered as he stalked down the corridor.

"I really think maybe now would be a good time to cut down on your coffee intake." Luc said cautiously before he was pinned against the wall in the blink of an eye by the vampire who was giving him a very impressive death glare just outside the entrance to the hall.

"I don't need to cut down on my coffee. God you are so annoying in the morning. And you are not obnoxious like so many other people, no, you happen to be obnoxious in a completely different and far worse way..." Nikola snarled out before letting go and heading straight for the Head Table to get some much needed coffee.

"Harsh. Note to self, do not talk to him until he's had at least two cups of high octane." Luc muttered as he smoothed out his clothes and headed inside.

By the time Luc had reached the head table, Nikola was already nursing a scalding hot cup of coffee with a blissful look on his face. Luc just shook his head and sat down next to his friend waving a white handkerchief jokingly.

"Is it safe to talk with you yet or are you going to try and kill me again this morning?"

"I didn't try to kill you." Nikola said as he put down his now empty cup.

"Did too."

"Did not."

"Did too."

"Did not."

"Did-"

"Will you both shut up already?" The arguing pair turned to face the irritable Potions Master who looked about half a second away from Avada-ing them. Nikola and Luc looked at each other, to the professor then back at each other before speaking together.

"Nope." Snape just groaned softly in annoyance at the answer and the identical looks of mischief on their faces. The other teachers snickered silently at the Potion Masters distress at having been forced to sit next to them especially after last nights staff meeting.

"Its like dealing with the Weasely twins all over again." Snape muttered. He was beginning to think that maybe he should have kept his remarks to himself at the staff meeting last night. He had made some remark that irritated Luc who decided his revenge would be to talk nonstop for the two hours before Dumbledore decided to show up about the color purple and its various shades in an annoyingly perky voice. Nikola had merely shaken his head at the happenings and gone back to his wine, which seemed to be a near permanent fixture for the man and his conversation about Animagi with Professor McGonagall.

"That's what happens when you know someone for so long." Nikola said pleasantly and handed Luc the pot of blackberry jam, which was taken without even looking. They continued passing each other items or doling food onto each other's plates without even looking or seemingly thinking about what they were doing as they conversed. They started eating and talking between bites, completely unaware of the strange looks the garnered from their colleagues and the early arising students.

By the time Luc had finished up his breakfast almost all the rest of the students were already just starting to eat. Nikola just looked at him as he nibbled on his toast.

"You go on ahead. I'll catch up with you once I'm finished." Nikola said and Luc nodded before getting up and skipping out of the Great Hall, which earned him a few really odd looks from the students.

"And he wonders why people think he is gayer then a tree full of monkeys on nitrous oxide." Nikola mumbled with a slight smile at his weird friends antics.

"How did you meet such a…colorful character?" Professor Sprout asked him.

"That's a long story involving a few dark wizards, an amulet, a ritual sacrifice, four werewolves, three gallons of dragons blood, an couple of angry Night Mares, two scythes, a couple sets of charmed hooded robes and two ducks." Nikola said simply causing a few stares. "Like I said, long story."

"Sounds like it. I look forward to hearing it sometime." Sprout said.

"Perhaps over a glass of wine one of these days." Nikola said with a grin that made her blush slightly. "But in the meantime, I have to meet my very odd friend in the library. So if you will be kind enough to excuse me." He said as he took his leave and headed to the library.

* * *

Nikola wandered through the many stacks of books searching for his friend until he finally found him leaning back in a chair, feet upon one of the tables with a stack of books sitting nearby and an open package of animal crackers. Nikola grabbed the other chair and sat down near his friend.

"And what are you looking at today?" Nikola asked as he slouched down in his chair a bit, very grateful he didn't have classes today.

"Oh just this and that." Luc said nonchalantly as he stared at an animal cracker contemplatively. "I'm vegetarian, so should I be eating animal crackers?"

"That never ceases to amuse me you know. A vegetarian Naga." Nikola said with a smile.

"Oh forgive me if the thought of eating burnt rotting flesh is unappealing to me. And you didn't answer my question, should I be eating animal crackers since I'm vegetarian?" Luc looked at Nikola with a serious face.

"I think your fine, although if Madame Pince finds out you're eating in the library I don't think you will remain that way much longer."

"Good point." Luc said and put the package away in his pocket but not before Nikola snatched one for himself. "Librarians are scary."

"I sense an interesting story there but I don't know if I want to know."

"There's a reason they don't let me into the Library of Alexandria any more."

"I thought it burned down centuries ago."

"Yeah but they managed to save it before there was too much damage and the magical folk decided to hide it away from Mundane eyes and let everyone think it was burned to the ground."

"Ok, still doesn't explain why you are banned."

"Haven't you ever wondered how the fire started?" Nikola looked at him in disbelief and the other man just looked sheepishly at him.

"You started it?"

"It was an accident. I was distracted by someone checking to see if I still had my tonsils and one thing led to another and before I knew it a torch got knocked over onto a pile of papyrus scrolls and you can probably guess what happened after that."

Nikola gave him a look that said he didn't believe him in the slightest.

"I thought Caesar burned it down."

"Well he was around at the time but the fire was started by me by accident but everyone thought it was him."

"And this relates to your fear of librarians how?" Nikola asked slightly confused.

"I almost burned down the greatest library in the world at that period in time…do I really have to spell it out for you?" Luc asked dryly as understanding lit up in Nikola's eyes.

"Oh."

"Yeah, who knew a bunch of librarians could be so creative?"

They were silent for a few minutes as Nikola absorbed the new information he learned about his friend and Luc was busy shuddering in remembrance of just how vindictive librarians could be when they wanted to be.

"So what were you reading before you decided to distract me with interesting stories of your past?" Nikola asked to break the silence.

"Nothing much. I was just going through a few things I found in my vault. You know, nothing very interesting." He said nonchalantly which caused Nikola to simply raise an eyebrow at him in disbelief. Luc squirmed in his seat for a moment before breaking down and telling the truth. He really wasn't very good at lying unless it was an absolute necessity.

"Ok fine, I was going through a few of my family journals and found one of my big brothers so I decided to read it."

"You have a brother?"

"Actually I have a few brothers and sisters."

"How did I not know about this?"

"You never asked."

"Well fine, how many brothers and sister do you have?"

"I have fifteen sisters and fourteen brothers. Well actually now its more like 5 brothers."

"Do I even want to know?"

"Lets just say that there is a reason I never intend to mate with another of my own kind." Nikola looked questioningly at him. "Females often eat their mates or kill them so the offspring can eat them."

"Ok then. So which brothers journal are you reading then?" Nikola asked as he completely avoided continuing the line of conversation involving a Nagini's mating habits.

"Oh this one is my very eldest brothers a few years before he got his head cut off by a maniac with a sword."

"A maniac with a sword?"

"Sal was always a nice guy but Ric was always an elitist snob and such a racist that when he found out Sal was a Naga he just went crazy and decided to cut off his head."

"Sal and Ric? You don't mean Salazar Slytherin and Godric Gryffindor?"

"Yeah, what else would I be talking about?" Luc asked in a clueless manner. Nikola rubbed his eyes in frustration. Sometimes he really wanted nothing more then to strangle his friend for being so obtuse.

"Remember that conversation we had a while back about things you should mention, this would be one of those things you should have mentioned to me."

"That Sal was my brother?"

"Yes."

"Oh, sorry. I don't usually think about these things but I'll try to remember for the future."

"Thank you."

"Sure. Anything else you want to know at the moment?"

"Not right now though I am sure I will think of something later."

"Okie dokie. Feel free to grab a journal if you like, my brother was a very…descriptive writer." Luc said with a grin as Nikola grabbed a journal and started reading.

* * *

"Why are we here Hermione?" Ron whined as Hermione dragged him into the library. She was also tugging Harry along as well and dragged them to their usual table in the stacks before disappearing into the rows of books.

"We need to get started on our homework. We only have a week for our Potions, Transfiguration and Charms essays and only a month for DADA." Hermione's voice came from the stacks as she grabbed the books they would need for their homework and returned to the table to drop them off before going to collect more.

The boys just groaned at the sight of the piles of books and slowly took out their parchment and quills as Hermione dumped another stack of books on the table before sitting down and promptly pulling out her parchment and quill to start her homework.

"You do know we have all week to get our homework done?" Ron asked. Harry just shook his head, he had learned by now that it would do no good to argue with Hermione and that it was simply easier to do his work before she decided to nag.

"And if it wasn't for me you wouldn't even remember to do your homework in the first place." She said scathingly and pulled a book over to start reading.

They worked mostly in silence for a while before Hermione and Ron managed to get into a slight argument which caused Harry to mumble something about finding a book and disappearing into the stacks to avoid having to take a side.

Honestly, why couldn't they just admit they like each other and be done with it? So far this year had not been going well for him. Half the students thought he killed Cedric, almost no one believed him when he said Voldemort was back and his best friends were fighting constantly because they couldn't admit they liked each other. Not to mention he wasn't sure if his defense teacher was going to try and kill him this year. Knowing his luck the teacher would probably turn out to be some evil vampire who wants to take over the world or something. On the other hand, at least History was good this year, they were actually learning about something other then Goblin rebellions.

Harry shook his head and fiddled with a book on the shelf wondering if it was safe to return to his friends yet when he heard the voices of his Defense and History teacher. He peeked through the books to see the pair slouching like students with books scattered all over the table and arguing.

"You are completely wrong and you know it." Nikola said.

"I am not wrong about this. I am telling you that I am right." Luc said waving his hands wildly.

"Come on you can't be serious about that."

"Why not?"

"Because it was wrong and you know it."

"It was a bad call."

"As if."

"You saw it as well as I did…"

"And it was terrible."

Harry frowned at the conversation and started to creep away only to fall over a book that was lying on the ground. By the time he picked himself off the ground, his two teachers were there in front of him.

"You ok kid?" Luc asked in mild concern.

"Yes sir. I just tripped." Harry said brushing off his robes.

"Hey, before you go off to do whatever you were doing, could you help us out? We were having an argument and we need an outside opinion on the matter." Luc said.

"Ok." Harry said slowly and Nikola decided to speak before Luc could.

"Luc here seems to think that the Montrose Magpies are going to win against the Tutshill Tornadoes in the next Quidditch match but I think he's wrong since the Magpies did so terribly in their last game…"

"It was a bad call by the referee that allowed the Holyhead Harpies to win that one. You know that the Magpies are the most successful team in history having won the British and Irish League 32 times. And they won the European Championship twice. It was just a bad game but they will come out on top again to crush those Tornadoes." Luc said fiercely.

"Anyway, as I was saying before interrupted, who do you think will win this year, the Tornadoes or the Magpies?" Nikola asked Harry who was trying not to laugh at the argument the two were having about Quidditch of all things.

"I'm not really sure. The Tornadoes are pretty good this year, won every match so far but the Magpies have a tendency of coming out on top when you least expect it." Harry said slowly as he thought about it. Nikola and Luc just nodded.

"I guess we will have to wait and see who wins this year." Luc said to Nikola who shrugged.

"I'm not worried." Nikola said with a smirk. "We both know the Tornadoes are going to win."

"We'll see." Luc said with narrowed eyes before turning back to Harry. "Thanks Mr…Potter right?"

"Yes sir."

"Thanks for your opinion. Didn't help with our argument but thanks anyway."

"No problem. Did you need anything else sirs?"

"How's your vampire essay going?" Nikola asked pleasantly.

"Could be better. Its hard finding information about vampires though." Harry said not wanting to be rude to his teacher.

"Ah, hold on a moment." Nikola disappeared into the shelves for a moment before returning with a very thick book, which he handed to Harry who nearly fell off balance due to its weight. "That should help you. It has the best information available on vampires in this library."

"Thank you sir."

"No problem."

"And when in doubt just remember this little tidbit, an essay should be like a miniskirt, long enough to cover everything but short enough to keep things interesting." Luc said as he butted into the conversation. Nikola just smacked him upside the head. "Ow, what was that for?"

"Don't influence the poor kid. One of you is enough, I don't feel like dealing with two."

"Hey, no need to be insulting."

"With you there is always a need."

"Hey quit making it sound like I am some crazy guy."

"Aren't you?"

Luc opened his mouth before shutting it for a moment then opened it again to reply. "I'm not crazy, my reality is just different then your own."

"Which makes you crazy."

"We are all crazy because Earth is the insane asylum of the universe."

"Yeah I believe that. Would explain a lot actually." Nikola said with a nod.

"But don't listen to a word he says kid. He's just jealous because I am so much cooler then him." Luc said in a matter of fact tone of voice and mild smirk on his face.

"Shut up." Nikola snapped out.

"Bite me." Luc said sticking his tongue out.

"Ew, I don't know where you've been." Nikola said and wrinkled his nose.

"You should probably head back to your friends before they wonder if the books decided to eat you up." Luc said jokingly causing Harry to laugh slightly as he headed back to his friends and away from the crazy teachers.

The last thing Harry heard was Nikola and Luc start up their Quidditch argument again as they went back to the table in their little corner.

_'__Dumbledore hired some really weird teachers this year.'_ Harry thought.


	4. Notice

**Hey sorry about no new chapter here but unfortunately my Internet has been cut off and this has been the first chance I have had to get online to post this little note.**

**This note is just to let everyone know that I have not abandoned my stories but my updates will probably be few and far between so please be patient with me. Thank you all and I will do my best to update whenever I can.**


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